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Cowboy’s guide to life

Found this gem on the web.

A Cowboy’s guide to life:

Life’s tough……It’s even tougher if you’re stupid. — John Wayne

Don’t interfere with something that ain’t botherin’ you none.

The easiest way to eat crow is while it’s still warm.

The colder it gets, the harder it is to swaller.

If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin’.

If it don’t seem like it’s worth the effort, it probably ain’t.

The biggest troublemaker you’ll probably ever have to deal with watches you shave his face in the mirror every morning.

Never ask a barber if you need a haircut.

Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong.

Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

Words that soak into your ears are whispered…not yelled.

Meanness don’t jes’ happen overnight.

Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

It don’t take a very big person to carry a grudge.

You cannot unsay a cruel word.

Every path has a few puddles.

When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

The best sermons are lived, not preached.

Most of the stuff people worry about ain’t never gonna happen, anyway.

Don’t judge folks by their relatives.

Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll enjoy it a second time.

Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

If you get to thinkin’ you’re a person of some influence, try orderin’ somebody else’s dog around.

Don’t worry about bitin’ off more’n you can chew; your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger’n you think.

Generally, you ain’t learnin’ nothing when your mouth’s a-jawin’.

If you ridin’ ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it’s still there with ya.

Good judgement comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgement.

Lettin’ the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin’ it back.

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back into your pocket.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Don’t squat with your spurs on.

Always drink upstream from the herd.

There’s two theories to arguin’ with a woman. Neither one works.

There’s three kinds of men: the one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation and the rest of them have to tinkle on the electric fence for themselves.

Never kick a cowchip on a hot day.

Never slap a man who’s chewin’ tobacco.

When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don’t be surprised if they learn their lesson.

When you’re throwin’ your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.

After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. – A hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you’re full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Do the next indicated right thing. Leave the rest to God.

Love and Peace, Barefoot ~~ Barefoot’s World ~~ http://www.barefootsworld.net/cowboyguide.html

Categories: Musings
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